When we left Joanie’s house we noticed a bunch of kids sitting on a curb on Columbia Street looking at something. We all walked over to see what was going on. As we looked into the street we could believe our eyes. I almost pooped in my pants. We all stood there with our mouths open because we see a dead Horse lying in the street. How could Joanie dead Uncle Bill know that there’s a dead Horse on Columbia Street. Did Mrs. Tina play a trick on us? It can’t be, because I had my hand on the Ouija pointer that was spelling out the dead Horse message. Could it be that creepy Six Finger Ricardo was in on it? Maybe the Chinese people who invented the Ouija Board thousands of years ago knew really how to talk to the dead. Really, really, talk to the dead? I see the dead Horse but I still can’t believe my own eyes. I feel like my whole world is now upside down. It’s such a creepy feeling. The Hell with it, we have to get ready for trick or treat and I’m not going to think about this weird crap right now.
I told my friends that I’m going home to get into my Halloween costume and I’ll meet them on Hick Street in about a half hour and I left them all there staring at the dead Horse lying in the street. When I got to my apartment I told my sister Isabel about the Ouija Board. I told her about Uncle Bill, and the dead Horse in the Street message. She said, “Get out, I heard about these Ouija Board stories but I don’t believe it.” “Hey I was there on the Ouija Board when Uncle Bill sent the message about the dead Horse and when I left the Halloween party there it was, I see the dead Horse, lying in the street. What in the Hell do you make of that?” She said, “Bullshit, somebody played a whopper of a trick on you kids.” I knew she wouldn’t believe me so I dropped it, got dressed got my chalk and flour sock and went out again to find my friends. When I got to Hicks street I found a small group of my friends with some little kids dressed up in homemade Halloween costumes. Then our little parade of trick or treat kids started going up and down the block collecting candy, fruit, nickels and dimes from some of their neighbors. We had to warn the little guys to be careful about eating some of the fruit or cookies they got.
Do not eat that stuff right away because some of the people on the block are mean and they will put stuff in your goodies that can hurt you. Make sure your parents check your goodies for BB’s, Razors, dirt, Pepper or anything else that doesn’t look right. It’s too bad that some people can be so cruel by trying to hurt a bunch of little kids who are out just to have some fun on Halloween. Sometimes the teenagers can be cruel too. They play Halloween pranks on their neighbors that are dangerous. Then the neighbors try to get back at them. One trick they play on trick or treat teenagers is to hand out Candy Apples to them and then they sneak in their batch of beautiful Candied Apples, with rotten Onions Candied in bright red to look like the real thing. When a teenager takes a big bite out of what they think is a Candied Apple, they get a mouth full of a onion that tastes like rotten eggs. Mrs. Folly was not a happy person to begin with. My mother told me that Mrs. Folly husband died at an early age she has been bitter ever since that happened. She kept to herself and didn’t have any woman friends.
My Mother pointed her finger at me and said in Italian, “Listen, you have to respect any adult even if they’re mean to you. That’s the rule, if you disrespect anyone for any reason and I hear about it, you will have to deal with me and the wooden spoon. Got that?” I said yes, but sometimes it was really hard to obey my Mother’s rule. Mrs. Folly is still pissed at the neighborhood kids who shot a Spalding ball through her open window when they were playing stoop ball last summer. The ball bounced all over her apartment and knocked over her prized porcelain lamp that broke into a thousand pieces.
So Halloween is a perfect for her to take revenge against the teenagers that broke her beautiful lamp many months ago. Mrs. Folly gets back at the kids with the rotten onion candy Apple look alike then the teenagers take revenge at Mrs. Folly by throwing eggs at her clean windows. There is no winner because the fight of who gets the upper hand never ends. By ten PM the trick or treat kids are off the block and at home checking all the goodies they collected. The teenagers and the want to be teenagers, who are nine to twelve years old, come out to play tricks and fight each other just for fun.
I see Roger the Professor walking down the block with a brown paper bag and a can of lighter fluid in his hand. His face way covered with black charcoal, he put his sister’s Maria’s bright red lipstick on his lips and he’s wearing a black wool cap pushed down over his ears. I say “Hey Roger what in the hell are you up to? Are you supposed to be a ghost or something with all that black charcoal on your face?” When he started to laugh, his white teeth looked brighter than ever against his black face, “Yeah, do you like my Halloween coal miner costume?
About this brown paper bag, I went to Coffey Park today with a little bucket and I picked up as much fresh dog poop I could find and I put it in this bag. Now I’m going to Mrs. Folly’s house to put this bag full of dog shit on her stoop close to her front door. Then I soak the brown paper bag with this lighter fluid, strike a match, light the bag and ring her door bell five or six times, then I run like hell. I wouldn’t run too far away. I’ll just run a safe distance and find a hiding place behind some garbage cans. This way I watch Mrs. Folly stomp the burning bag when she tries to put the fire out. If my plan works, she will have dog crap all over her feet and legs.
What do you think? Do you want to watch the action?” I agreed and I found a safe spot about six doors away so I could watch Roger do his evil deed. Sure enough everything Roger said went as planned. All of a sudden I see flames shooting up on Mrs. Folly’s stoop and fat Roger running towards me yelling “Get down, get down.” It took Mrs. Folly only a couple of seconds to open the front door, then she starts stomping the paper bag as hard as she can with her feet. She does a good job in putting out the fire. Then we hear a loud, very loud scream. “Ahaaaaa, what is this shit. It’s all over my shoes; I’m going to get the son of a Bitch who did this and I’ll kill the Bastard.” After she stomped the fire out she sat down on the stoop with two hands on her face and she kept on saying in a low voice “I’m going to get the Bastard, I’m going to get the Bastard.” Me and Roger slid down as far as we could behind the garbage cans laughing. We were laughing so hard that tears were flowing down our cheeks. Then I hear Mrs. Folly crying and sobbing and sobbing, it was like she couldn’t stop. I looked at Roger with his coal miner costume and black face and said, “Roger, I don’t like Mrs. Folly but that was a mean trick you played on her.
That poor lady is falling apart. Now I have to go to confession and apologize to God for not stopping you and for laughing at Mrs. Folly. When I confess my sins to father Ryan I think he will order me to say fifty Hail Mary’s and fifty Al Father’s and then he will kick me around the block for being so mean. Roger turned to me and said, “Pepino. Don’t be such a Pussy; it’s only a Halloween Prank.” “Oh Yeah, if this Prank was pulled on your Mother? I don’t think you would be laughing. You would search for the Bastard who did it and then you would kick his Ass.” Then we see Mrs. Folly get up, turn and walk into her house still crying. Okay, that wasn’t as much fun as I thought it would be. I left Roger who was still crouched down behind the garbage cans and went off to find my friends. It was almost midnight when I hooked up with my friends, Pecker, Reno the Greek, Nunzio Superman, Blackface Henry, Jimmy Pizza, Mike Tomato, Prospector Frank and a bunch of other kids I didn’t know. Their clothes were all marked up with color chalk, mostly from the girls who chase the boys and mark them for fun. This happens every Halloween and I think the boys like the idea of the girls running after them.
The girls marked them up good this year because most of the guys had all kinds of crazy colors all themselves. Now we had to choose sides for our Halloween War Games. We have our flour socks ready and the rotten tomatoes, fruit, and potatoes that Mike Tomato saved from his grandfather’s wagon. Then it started, we whipped each other with socks filled with flour. That really hurt and we started to look like ghosts with all that white powder flying all over the place. Then the rotten tomatoes, potatoes was flying everywhere it was great a great battle and it didn’t matter who’s team you were on because we just hit anyone who was close to us. When the war was over we all smelled like rotten fish and we all looked like a bunch of Zombies. Our face, clothes, arms, sneakers and hair were covered with white flour mixed in with rotten produce all over ourselves, what a sight. Afterwards we just sat on the curb looking and laughing at each other. It was a perfect Halloween holiday and now we can look forward to cold weather, snow and Christmas…….